NFP: Path to Holiness

While considering the theme of this edition of our quarterly newsletter — the integration of Natural Family Planning formation into parish ministries and apostolates — three moments of enlightenment from my own history came to my mind. I suppose you could even call them moments of conversion. The first moment involves my father and a magazine. When I was a boy, my oldest sister gifted me with a subscription to Sports Illustrated. I loved following sports, and still do, and I loved following stories about teams and athletes. However, once a year, Sports Illustrated would publish a “swimsuit edition”. Back in the day, the photos of the women in bathing suits were included in the regular weekly edition of SI. Nowadays, the swimsuit edition is a completely separate publication and subscribers can opt out of receiving it. In any case, my father, who would pick up the mail, would always tear out the pictures of the women in bathing suits from my Sports Illustrated! I was annoyed to say the least. It was only with the passage of time that I appreciated that he was trying to protect my purity. Indeed, he was doing what any father should do for his son or daughter: fostering their innocence and instilling virtue.

A second moment of enlightenment came when I was a seminarian in Rome, Italy, studying at the John Paul II Institute for Studies on Marriage and the Family. I had (and still have) a good friend, Mary from England, who was also a student at the JPII Institute. One day after class, I said to Mary: “I like studying this marriage and family stuff, because it is going to help me to give good instruction and counsel to engaged and married couples when I will be a priest.” (I was thinking of the JPII curricula as something that I could put in my “priest toolbox” and carry with me.) Mary did not completely disagree with me, but she pointed out something even more important. She said: “Blaise, these classes on marriage and family should help you better understand your future priesthood.”

Finally, a third and final moment of enlightenment came from my bishop, Bishop Jaime Soto. About ten years ago, I remember attending a NFP gathering of some sort with the Bishop. He noted that formation in NFP is absolutely vital for engaged couples, but if the couples were hearing about NFP for the first time six months before their wedding date, it’s way too late. Of course, Bishop Soto was spot on.

These three episodes illustrate some foundational principles for any kind of NFP formation that goes on, whether in the parish, or, for that matter, anywhere else. First of all, those of us who are promoting, teaching NFP and receiving NFP formation, need to see NFP as integrative to who we are as a person. For example, as a priest and spiritual father, I have an obligation, above all to God, to ensure that those under my care are receiving the truth about how and why God created them and the Son redeemed them. NFP does that! Second, in order that NFP is not a last minute box to check six months before marriage, those of us involved in parish ministries and apostolates, need to work to integrate NFP teaching and living into every aspect of parish life: Baptism prep, RCIA, youth and young adult ministry, Confirmation and Quinceañera prep, marriage prep, marriage enrichment, Knights of Columbus gatherings, etc. No matter where we are in life, young, old, married, single, widowed, we all need to be messengers of the good news of NFP. The reason is, and this is the third and final point: NFP teaches the virtues of patience, self-awareness, self-mastery, self-surrender love and above all, God’s beauty, goodness and truth. When we can grasp that and live it, we are striving for holiness and preparing ourselves well for that adventure that awaits us called eternal life.