Why CANFP

I joined the Executive Board of CANFP in 2016 as a wild-eyed seminarian who had just taken a course in the seminary on human sexuality. This was revolutionary stuff for me; Pope Paul VI’s Humanae Vitae, as well as Pope John Paul II’s book Love and Responsibility and Theology of the Body.I found myself asking, “where was this when I was growing up?” “Why didn’t anyone ever teach me about this?” I did not doubt that learning this earlier would have changed many aspects of my young adult life for the better.

I was pondering these questions when Sheila St. John asked me to join the Board at the end of 2015, after we reconnected at the CANFP conference in San Francisco. At first, I hesitated, having absolutely zero board experience. She assured me that there would be a place for me, if only recording the minutes of our meetings as the secretary. I happily joined, seeing my participation in this Board as a participation in those groundbreaking, potentially life-altering teachings of, not only the Popes, but scientists and doctors. NFP is effective, not only from a religious/spiritual perspective, but from a practical, scientific one, which is why couples who use it are so connected and committed to one another. It is highly accurate and effective in obtaining, or preventing pregnancy, while also fostering a spiritual bond based on communication and self-sacrifice. Learning this was a big deal for me, and having lived a life that was more selfish than selfless, I wanted to be a part of something bigger than myself. This is why I said “yes” to be on the CANFP Board.

Being a part of something bigger than ourselves is a universal desire. We all want to serve; we all want to give back. What I have learned from my years of service in the Church and on this Board is that service has a peculiar way of benefiting the one who serves. In 2018 at our conference on the 50th Anniversary of Humanae Vitae, I witnessed hundreds of people coming together with enthusiasm and joy to celebrate this misunderstood, and often times dismissed document. It was a blessed weekend, that I am thankful to have been a part of.

Apart from these larger experiences that being on the Board offers me, it is the daily reminder that I am most thankful for. Serving on this Board is a reminder to me to never forget how essential this teaching is, and to promote it, despite the backlash that one may face. Saying yes to NFP and no to artificial contraception is not a popular choice. Although we learn about it in the seminary, priests are often the first ones to dismiss it. I once encountered a priest who rolled his eyes at me when I mentioned that same 50th Anniversary conference. “We don’t talk about NFP in this parish,” he said smirkingly. What a loss for his parish.

In my time as a newly ordained priest, I will admit, I have not gone all-out with preaching about NFP from the pulpit, nor have I implemented a plan in my parish that adequately educates couples about NFP. This will happen. In the meantime, I take marriage preparation very seriously, choosing to meet with the couples myself several times, and to participate in their marriage preparation weekends, offering to hear their Confessions. I credit my service on the CANFP Board for that, as it keeps before my eyes not only the importance of a healthy and holy sexuality, but also, it’s achievability. NFP can change lives for the better, and if I can help just one couple to learn this, then this work will be worth it.