Morality of timing of female orgasm within marital act
Question
In regards to the rules of marital chastity my husband and I who practice NFP are clear on the rule that male ejaculation must take place in the female vagina in the act of marital union. However could you clarify the rules for the stimulation and orgasm of the female during the act of marital union. Is it appropriate for a husband to stimulate his wife genitally before intercourse and after intercourse if she does not have an orgasm? Is it a sin if the woman has an orgasm before the act of intercourse or after?
Answer
Last Updated: July 23, 2013
No. The Church is very clear that before the marital act, a great deal of freedom is allowed to affectionately prepare each partner for the marital embrace. This of course includes the husband stimulating his wife. Ideally, it would be great if both husband and wife could enjoy orgasm together during intercourse.
However, for various reasons, this may not always be possible. Thus, if a woman has an orgasm prematurely before intercourse, it is not a sin but a miscalculation of orgasm. Likewise, if a man ejaculates during intercourse and the woman has not experienced an orgasm, it wouldn’t be sinful for the husband to stimulate his wife to orgasm. Again, the man’s premature ejaculation was a miscalculation and not intended.
The Church sees marital intercourse as a joyful exchange of life and love between a husband and wife. It is not seen by the Church as an overprecise act in which a miscalculation like premature ejaculation will lead to sin. Rather, the Church sees marital sexuality as a beautiful expression of committed love.
Edward Benioff
However, for various reasons, this may not always be possible. Thus, if a woman has an orgasm prematurely before intercourse, it is not a sin but a miscalculation of orgasm. Likewise, if a man ejaculates during intercourse and the woman has not experienced an orgasm, it wouldn’t be sinful for the husband to stimulate his wife to orgasm. Again, the man’s premature ejaculation was a miscalculation and not intended.
The Church sees marital intercourse as a joyful exchange of life and love between a husband and wife. It is not seen by the Church as an overprecise act in which a miscalculation like premature ejaculation will lead to sin. Rather, the Church sees marital sexuality as a beautiful expression of committed love.
Edward Benioff
Answered By:
Edward Benioff
Fr. Edward Benioff, priest for the Archdiocses of Los Angeles, is pastor of Good Shepherd parish in Beverly Hills, CA, a Church Member of CANFP.
